When I was 21, I attended a Women in Film conference in hopes of finding someone to help me produce, edit and air my TV Show idea “Get Out”.
I wanted to randomly talk to people in the city, hear what they were up to and basically cause a bit of a comedy ruckus where-ever I went.
I had just finished my Improv training and I was ready to hit the streets and become a TV Star.
Well, at that conference I boldly stood up and told the entire crowd exactly what I wanted. I cried a little at the end with a bit of shame that I wanted it so bad and I didn’t know how to get it. Right when I sat back down, the organizer cut to a break without even acknowledging what I had said. I felt so dismissed and embarrassed, I was unable to move as I wept a bit more.
Moments after, I heard a voice beside me say “I’ll help you.” I looked up and saw a kind man who was touched by my story. He was a camera operator and editor who had the skills I needed to bring this dream to life and he was willing to donate his time to help me see this through. Together we created this “Get Out” pilot below. I did all I knew to do and pitched it the best I could to networks or anyone who would listen…
(If you read “Free Spirit” at all, you get a peek at the Bus Driver I was dating in Chapter 3. :)
…BUT GOT ZERO TRACTION. No one wanted it.
With all that to say, I still put myself out there and was able to create something that was near and dear to my heart’s desire just by BOLDLY stating it to a room of hundreds of people.
You never know what could come your way if you’re courageous enough to ask.
I wish this TV Show idea had taken off back then, but I can see how it was a progression in my evolution as a host, speaker, producer, director.
It was a step in the direction of my dreams, not the final destination. This experience gave me the confidence to keep moving towards what I wanted most even though I encountered NO’s along the way. I also got confirmation that people DO come out of the woodwork when you’re clear with what you want and you’re not afraid to ask for it.
And as you know I did have my own TV show 9 years later called The GOtoGAL - dream come true. CHECK.
That wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t declared what I wanted. I had two amazing partners that helped bring that show to life - and I met the love of my life making that show! So, double bonus.
NOW, if you are ready to see some dreams come to fruition I AM HERE FOR YOU.
One of my favourite things in the world is helping you to bring your heart’s desire to life in your business. If you’re ready for that…
I’ve helped hundreds if not thousands of Entrepreneurs bring their dream businesses to life either through business and marketing strategy or video storytelling.
I care deeply for those who are on a mission to change the way we see and do things for the betterment of humanity and the planet through the work they choose to do in the world.
I desire to elevate these voices and that’s exactly what I do and I’m not afraid to say it.
To celebrate International Women's Day I put on a talk series to highlight some of my Light Leader Members and friends who are doing work to help people look through a new lens, to make new choices, and to do what's right, not only in their life but in the lives of others that generates peaceful perspectives.
Below are two out of the nine speakers that were featured but all of them can be found here.
They are all worth a listen.
Fresh Magazine published a coffee table style book of 365 women in Canada who were all in pursuit of success and happiness and I was one of the contributors. I got to share my journey of how mishaps and mistakes help me find my confidence and self-trust, ultimately leading to my dream business and relationships. You can read the full article HERE and see the other women's stories.
Shaeah Love is a self-love advocate who helps people tap into their precious inner compass and awaken to their own self-love. She is a gifted facilitator with roots in the Hawaiian spirit of ‘aloha’. Using principles learned from these sacred islands of Hawaii, Shaeah guides people to heal and align their mind, body, heart, and spirit so they can open to radical self-love. She does this through Lomi Lomi massage, group coaching programs, and one-to-one training. In this interview she gives us 3 tips on how to tap into our self love NOW.
Before I launched into another diet or workout routine I consulted with my Body Positive Mentor Gillian Goerzen, as I was becoming weary of yet another program that wouldn't last. I decided instead to book weekly calls with her to get to the root of my body image as I've grown tired of the stories I've been telling myself to date.
Here is that story, and the resolution and mindset shifts I'm currently experiencing.
I rarely ever saw myself as not fat. There's maybe a handful of times I can remember feeling 'in shape' and 'good enough'. Never thin. I would never be thin, that just wasn't my body type or so I've been told since I was young. I'm 'bigger boned, bigger build,' they would say. Not thin and pretty like the other girls. So I rested on that fact and my body story began to develop.
I would and still to this day compare myself to skinny girls. I feel I couldn't beat them in looks, or beauty, so somehow I failed to be as perfect as them. When I'm around someone who's bigger or heavier set than me, I feel like somehow I've won! The beauty contest prize is mine!
It's disgusting. I'm ashamed to even say it. It brings tears to my eyes even admitting this as part of my story. How gross.
Where did this thought process of competition come from and how can I end it with myself?
I was with two gorgeous, thinner-than-me gals yesterday who looked to be 'owning' their femininity. Wearing beautiful dresses, shoes, hair, lashes and make-up done. I on the other hand showed up in jeans, a t-shirt, hair in a pony tail with a 2 minute face touch-up and flip flops. I felt like shit even though I felt fine about how I looked when I left the house.
Why did I have to look so frumpy? Why didn't I dress up too? Where does all this body-shaming come from and how does it stop!?
I can look back at any old picture of me and think "God, you weren't fat, but NOW you ARE."
To every single one.
You weren't then but you are now for 20 years.
What will it take to truly love the body I am in right now? Because as it turns out, it was OK.
Even in my thinnest moments I stil remember it not being enough. I still wasn't satisfyed. Those times when I did love the body I was in it was from dieting, exercise or extreme stress, none of which was sustainable.
If I let go of this story I fear I will let myself go.
But what if that doesn't happen?
What if instead I feel liberation and freedom to move my body my way?
What if the need to critize or judge myself and others for their body composition evaporates?
What if I could honour my body, see the joy in my skin and wish for all to also feel that elated no matter their size?
Can I own my body, my figure my shape?
Here's my response to the questions I asked myself.
The idea of competition has been engrained in our culture from the beginning of time. Survival of the fittest. Reprograming my brain to live in a neutral zone around appearance will take time but I am willing to do the practice. If I change my mind to "no girl is winning, therefore I am not needing to compete or win" it brings a sense of ease and relief to my bones. It will take time, but I am changing my mind.
I choose to feel good in the clothes that I pick out for myself each day. I get to choose. I get to pick what represents ME that day.
Our bodies aren't cars, RV's or motorhomes of our soul. They are living breathing organisms ever changing, growing, adapting, expanding, shrinking, living. Therefore the truth of your body now will never be again. So instead of dreaming of another model, S type, or fancy feature you could have, move into what is now and want that instead.
Body shaming is a made up thought. And I have the capacity and will to choose better.
What's your body story?
If you're interested in sharing it or learning more about your body image, I highly recommend working with Gillian from Super You. She has an incredible community of women who she supports and nurtures to understand and feel into loving their body they're in.
Watch my interview with gillian from super you
Coach Michelle Jackson is a Certified Life and Transformative Healing Coach, Motivational Speaker, Self-Published author of 3 books, Poet and Volunteer for NAMI Chicago (National Alliance on Mental Illness) and AFSP IL (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention).
She's overcome severe depression, 4 suicide attempts, molestation, incest, and sexual abuse. Now she works with groups and speaks about forgiveness, healing, love, and purpose. Today she talks about bias behavior and the actual way to love someone is through acceptance.
Buy her best selling book FLPT on Amazon.
This 5-ish minute meditation will help you connect to your inner expansiveness and guide you down the path of your true dreams and desires. You have a one-of-a-kind message because it comes from the one and only you.
Let your voice out so we can experience its wonder.
Listen to this meditation as often as you need to.
Love and Light,
Adera is the Co-founder of SPIRO Creative, and a Business, Video + Marketing Strategist to Entrepreneurs who are ready to make it their business to lead with their light. With over a decade in TV + Video she’s witnessed loads of talented amazing souls shy away when it comes to ‘putting themselves out there.’ She has a gift for helping those who once struggled to share themselves show up as authentic storytellers and joyful risk-takers, confident in their abilities to build businesses and connections that move humanity forward.